If you follow my Instagram account you already know that Tim & I welcomed our sweet babies, Lola Isabella and Penelope Rose, into the world on April 9th! My pregnancy was a tumultuous one. I’m happy to share that the girls are healthy and doing great, spending some time in the NICU to grow even stronger before they come home in a few weeks!
I’ve thought a lot about what to share and what not to share related to my pregnancy, as I now have a blog and do want to be open with my readers. A quick summary of my pregnancy is that I had sudden complications at 22 weeks resulting in a brief hospital stay where luckily our girls’ lives were saved. I spent the rest of my pregnancy on “home-rest”, until my water broke one morning when I was in bed, leading to me giving birth two days later when the girls were 31 weeks and 3 days.
Pregnancy was not what I expected, but I believe the experience is so very different for every woman & I’ve learned some valuable lessons from it.
First off, don’t worry about what other people say. Having some sense of thick skin when pregnant is actually a very important thing! This is your experience and you should share it with however few or many people you want to. When a friend shares something with me, even if it’s just a small part of their full story, I tend to want to relate. This was hard for me throughout my pregnancy because I often wanted to freak out when friends and family members I love would tell me, “you’re fine” … or even the opposite “aren’t you going crazy being on bedrest?” when they didn’t fully know what was going on. Part of me wanted to scream, actually I’m just glad my kids are still alive, but you can’t blame someone for saying the wrong thing when they don’t know the full story. I pretty quickly adjusted and realized that anyone saying these things had good intentions, and was able to let it go.
Secondly, I was shocked about how many people asked me private questions! Like, if you’re not one of my three closest friends and you’ve never heard me talk about my vagina before, why start now? This was shocking at first, then became sort of hilarious. It frankly feels like you’re interviewing for a job sometimes… the position of a “fit parent”. Will you be breastfeeding? For how long? Are you going to have an epidural? Vaginal Birth? Sleep training? LOL…. The list goes on.
Thirdly, how did I know so little about recovering from childbirth? I’m incredibly impressed with what our bodies, as women, are capable of. I’ve also never had such a great appreciation for my body. When I really started to show during my pregnancy I’d look back at pictures of myself and think… damn girl, how did you not realize how good you had it?! Now that I’m 4 weeks out I’m shocked at how much I already feel like myself again, and how much perspective I’ve gained from becoming a mother. There were some rough times during the first two weeks of recovery including being incredibly sore, not being able to walk properly, postpartum edema, insane night sweats, and total exhaustion, but thankfully pain is fleeting and 4 weeks out the experience is interesting to look back on, rather than defeating. I spent a lot of my young adult life beating myself up for not being completely perfect, and now when my body is the least “perfect” than it’s ever been I also feel a new sense of gratitude.
Thanks for reading and lots more on Poppy & Lola to come this summer!